America Wants to Know
What will she do with him?
That is, if she’s elected.
She’ll have to take him
with her to the White House
after keeping him in the doghouse.
Maybe the FBI can put
the doghouse out on the lawn.
He shouldn’t be a problem there.
Only men jump over the fence.
Slip of a Thing
Millicent was the daughter
who danced ballet and sang until
she met Butchie on a rainy day.
He was in coveralls
and cowboy hat and fixed
two flats on her Infiniti.
He asked her for a date
and she sighed yes and so
despite her family's laments
he picked her up in his truck
and they sang and bounced along
bumpy roads to the county fair.
Months later they eloped
and Millicent helped Butchie
run his car wash in Kentucky.
It's 50 years now since they wed
and Millicent has seven children,
twice as many grandkids.
No longer a slip of a thing,
she’s gray and plump but still
loves to let Butchie have his way
at least once a week.
Makes her feel like a bride again
to hear him yodel at the end.
Tradition Interrupted
Jack’s a widower.
His wife died years ago
so every year he takes a plane
and helps his mother decorate
his childhood home for Christmas.
Mom’s getting up in years.
Stringing lights
around the house is
never easy and it’s not easy
hanging the wreath
on the chimney straight
with Mom supervising.
She’s very fussy.
Jack knows he’s too old
to climb a ladder every year
but he’s afraid that if he doesn't
his mother just might try it.
She did for several years after
Dad fell off the roof and died.
A hip replacement stopped her.
The tough part's always been
taking everything back down
before his flight back home.
But this year that’s no problem.
Late one silent night,
someone stole everything
even the ladder in the yard.
Next year folks won’t see Jack
up on the roof at Christmas
getting that wreath just right.
Donal Mahoney lives in St. Louis, Missouri.
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